Happy For The First Time
by augustepiphany
Summary: He loved her. But has she ever noticed him? A completed one-shot.


**A/N: **There is a bit of a twist to this one-shot. But don't skip to the end! Now, I don't follow this ship, but I thought … why not? Have fun and don't forget to review!

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**Happy For the First Time**

He watched her, knowing who she was and what she was. But it didn't matter to him. Not any more. He knew who he was. Where he came from. That didn't matter to him, either. The only thing that mattered was her.

She picked up her bag, slung it over her shoulder and left the Great Hall, her concentration in her book.

He smiled. In her book. As always. He watched her walk past his table and out the hall. He watched her go.

_Do it! _Said a small voice in the back of his mind. _Do it now!_

But he didn't move. She was gone, and there went her two sidekicks. He scowled at them. He despised them. They hated him. That was where _they _stood. But what about him and her?

He never tormented her – well, not like the others, anyway. He only did it to stop himself picking her up and kissing her all over her beautiful face.

_Please, _he thought, as he stood up. _Please let me have the courage to do it today!_

He walked out the hall, and no one paid any attention to him. He followed the small group, waiting for any sign, any sign at all …

_'You know, Ron, you should stop saying that.'_

_'Why?'_

_'You know why.'_

_'I thought you were over that?'_

A pause. He held his breath.

_'Of course I am! I just think you should stop it, that's all.'_

He didn't know what they were talking about, but he felt his stomach drop. He knew it wasn't anything good to do with him.

_'All right.__ I'll stop.'_

_'Thank you.'_

She walked ahead of them, leaving the two boys to talk. He listened carefully, just in case.

_'She's nuts, you know.'_

_'Ron.'_

_'I'm serious! She's really lost it this time. First it was Krum, and now it's –'_

_'It's _her _decision. Leave it alone.'_

_'You're just as nuts as she is.'_

_'If you're implying –'_

_'I'm not implying anything! Honestly, mate, just saying. I wonder if he knows?'_

_'I doubt it. Don't you go telling him!'_

_'I wasn't going to! Like I would. Seriously, though, I wonder if he does?'_

_'If he does, he hasn't said anything.'_

_'Hmmm…'_

He let them walk ahead of him. In fact, he stopped walking altogether. He leant back against the stone wall of the corridor and uttered one dry sob.

She liked someone. He had known about the Krum thing: how could he not? But now, if what Ron had said was true, she liked someone else. Who? He dared not hope it would be him. He knew it wasn't. It never was. She thought of him as nothing, not a soul worth contemplating. She walked past like he wasn't there. She spoke to those around him, but never to him. The only look she gave him was one of scathing hate. She didn't deserve to feel hate. Not like that.

He stood back up and looked around. He felt ill, like he'd eaten something he shouldn't have. His stomach writhed and twisted, as did the rest of his organs. His chest was hurting, as though his heart had literally been taken and twisted into different shapes, so all that was left was an aching, shapeless mess.

Turning his back on the dungeon corridor, he walked slowly back up towards the entrance hall, trying not to think. Trying to hold the tears back. Trying to –

Someone called his name. His given name.

He turned again to see her walking along the corridor towards him. She was wearing a look of mingled curiosity and bemusement.

_'Why aren't you in class?' _she asked, tipping her head on the side.

_'Why aren't _you _in class?' _he retorted, his tongue falling back on how he always talked to her. But, as it did, he realised something: they were alone. Just her and him. No meddling sidekicks. Just the two of them.

_'I forgot something,' _she said, waving her hand at the stone steps behind him. _'I was going back to get it.'_

He knew she was waiting for his explanation. He didn't have one to give her.

_'I – forgot something very important I had to do,' _he said quickly, avoiding her face. Her beautiful face.

She took a step toward him.

_'What was it?' _she asked quietly. She had that determined expression he loved and admired.

_'I – that's none of your business.' _He said it without thinking, an instinctive reply. She looked slightly hurt for a moment, but then shrugged slightly and the expression slid away to a calm one, without much feeling. It hurt him to see that expression. He wanted to see her feelings. He wanted to see her laugh.

He knew he would never make her laugh. He had never made her smile.

Feeling hopeless, he turned to leave.

She said his name again. It made him stop. Why did she keep calling him that? He was surprised she knew it. He turned slowly, his eyes taking in every outline, every curve, and the way one hip was slightly stuck out, the way her hair fell around her face in messy, tousled waves.

He opened his mouth to tell her to stop calling him by his first name. But when he saw her face, her brown eyes, and her lips curled into a small smile, he said something completely different.

_'What did you come back for?'_

She smiled properly and took another few steps toward him, closing the distance between them.

_'What did you have to do?' _she asked him, playing the game, her eyes twinkling. His heart erupted in painful thumps. But he wasn't going to lose the game.

_'What did you forget? What did you come back for?'_

She stepped once more, and they were less than two feet apart. His breath quickened.

_'You,' _she said simply, and she put one hand on the back of his neck, pulling him down to her. She stood on her tiptoes and their lips met before he could register what was happening.

He closed his eyes and kissed her back, his hands now on her hips.

And for the first time in his life, Severus Snape was happy.

**A/N: **Ta-da! What do you think? You can tell me by REVIEWING! Come on, people, you know you want to!


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